Box 4

I have been going to Flushing a lot lately, specifically to my favorite cafeteria, Box 4. I had come one evening to find the place boarded up, and was horrified that perhaps they had closed. As is turns out, they simply moved to another location, and was now a part of Cafeteria 28. 

Today was a good day because I took my first ballet class. By first I mean first class as an adult. It was a lot of fun, and a really good class to have in combination with Bikram yoga, since Bikram yoga doesn't do so much with the hips. 

Earlier at box 4, I had ordered my food and prepared to sit down and eat in peace while reading a book. Some random guy sat next to me and said, in Mandarin, "excuse me miss, but can we please be friends?" I had heard that in China before and assumed that it was because I was a foreigner and they really wanted a foreign friend, but I'm beginning to realize that perhaps when men ask to be "friends," they mean in a romantic sense. Now it makes sense when a random "friend" in China kept trying to buy stuff for me, and I had protested, and he had kept saying, "we are friends now, so I have to buy you stuff." These culture issues are so interesting.

Anyhow, this guy was really unattractive, and I wanted to be left alone, but I felt unsure of how to reply. Because in theory if someone just asks to be friends, it's okay if indeed they just want friendship. My first thought was to pretend I didn't speak Mandarin. Then I just blurted a lie and said, "I already have a boyfriend."

I had mixed feelings about this, because I had read an article about how women always try to spare men their feelings and invent a fake boyfriend, or they say they have a boyfriend because sometimes men will refuse to back down unless you have already been "claimed" by someone else. "We shouldn't be afraid or feel bad to just say, 'I'm not interested,'" the article said. But I do feel bad, because I think it takes a lot of courage to approach someone.

"Oh ok," he said, and backed off. He then proceeded to take out his cell phone, and watch a drama at full volume. I hate when people don't use headphones. It's really rude to make other people have to listen to your music or your shows. He also chewed his food super loudly, with wet smacking noises. In Asia, apparently it isn't rude to eat noisily. I moved to another table to enjoy the rest of my meal in peace.