Wedding in Poughkeepsie

My friend from law school married his childhood love; they met about 12 years ago so perhaps teenage love is a better description. Since I am in between jobs at the moment, I went to Poughkeepsie early to help them with set up for the wedding. The bride works as a theatre director, and is a dancer, so of course there would be a dance number. While the wedding party was rehearsing, I helped assemble lanterns. At one point the entire room was a mess of cardboard, plastic, and other packaging materials as we scrambled to cut the flowers and set up the center pieces before the ceremony. I joked that they picked the wrong person to hang lanterns on the trees--since I'm quite short, we had a bunch of low hanging (though pretty) lanterns along the trees. Later some taller people added more.

I was in charge of the welcome table, along with my other friend. I had taken off my high heels because we had been doing a lot of moving around, and as the guests arrived, I realized that I had lost my shoes! My friend took over the table for me, while I searched frantically for my shoes. As I found them, someone asked me whether the ceremony would start on time, since some people were still walking from the station. I said it wouldn't, since I figured they might still be rehearsing. "But the groom said it would start on time."

"Well he's probably right then, so they should hurry. Anyhow what do I know, I lost my shoes!" 

The ceremony was beautiful, and held outside, overlooking the river and mountains of Poughkeepsie. It really was a gorgeous venue. The groom was so happy that he cried, which was really sweet. The food was particularly good, and there was an open bar. My favorite was the shrimp and coconut panna cotta, and for dinner I had rib eye steak. I hadn't eaten that much meat in a while, so I ended up feeling a bit sick the next day but it was worth it. Of course, the dance party was a lot of fun, since the bride is a dancer and many of her friends are very good dancers too. 

They chartered a bus to take us home, and I passed out and slept the entire way back. 

Zhong Huang Spa

Since coming back from China and getting massages there, I wanted to try to find a more affordable massage spa in the US. I think it is probably good for your body to go regularly, if possible. I hadn't been actively looking though, but I guess that is when you often find the things you need. 

Last time I went to Flushing, I had come across a cafeteria that had a long buffet, and allowed you to pick five items for five dollars. This was probably the closest thing I found to the little eateries in China. I was able to get the steamed eggplant with cilantro that I liked, along with wood ear and celery, and broiled tofu skin. Today I decided to go back to that eatery, since I have more free time. On my way there, I saw signs for massage spas. Since my Chinese reading has improved, I could now understand that it was 25 dollars an hour for a full body massage. Since there were many, I used yelp to look at reviews. 

One place, called Zhong Huang spa, was rated very well. They were slightly more expensive, at 30 per hour, but reviews stated that the workers there were a lot more skilled in acupressure and Chinese medicine. I decided to try it. 

They do not really speak English, which is fine for me. I even helped interpret for a random stranger who also went to the spa. At first it was relaxing, so relaxing that I almost fell asleep--but then the real massage began. This ended up being an incredibly painful massage. My masseuse was very skilled, and pointed out many of my problems right away. However, he was also merciless in trying to fix these problems. I yelped in pain a few times and he said, politely, "you have to endure the pain, otherwise it won't get better." During the session he explained, "when non Chinese come for massage, they want it to feel good. If it is painful they get mad, and my English is not good so I can't explain to them that it is supposed to be like this." In fact, they actually don't call their massages "massages", they call it "body work." 

After the massage, I felt like I had been beaten up. I dragged myself to a tea house to get a bubble tea, and then crawled onto the metro, curled up into a small ball and leaned against the rail. I felt exhausted! But in 30 minutes, I felt great. I ended up meeting a former colleague for coffee. When I arrived he said, "are you okay? You look like you've been crying." I was, on the massage table! There were some areas that were so painful that my eyes watered. 

Now I'm on the train to Poughkeepsie for a wedding, and I feel really good. I will definitely go back to that massage place again. 

Mount Vernon Bike Trail

I went to DC for my best friend's birthday, and it also happened to be restaurant week. She had mentioned that we might be riding bikes, but I didn't think much of it, and only packed dresses. When I arrived, it turned out that riding bikes meant a 9 mile bike ride. One of the friends is pregnant so she was going to drive, and I tried to go with her, but was peer pressured into staying. It turned out to be really fun though. I had forgotten how much I liked bike riding. Last time I went biking in DC we had gone through the city, and narrowly missing a bunch of cars put me off biking for some time. I like biking on trails, where there are no cars.

The lunch restaurant was an Italian place, called Filomena. Apparently President Clinton used to go there and eat their lobster pasta. Afterwards, we went to the spa at the Ritz Carlton. There was a private room for our group, and no other party was there so we had the entire locker room to ourselves. Dinner was at Nopa, which was a really good restaurant. We ate grilled octopus and cod, but now I really miss Chinese food again, after two days of not having it.

On Sunday, I helped my friend babysit a little girl who is half Korean and half American (not entirely sure what her mom's background is). She is really cute, with Asian features and blue eyes. She is two years old, and very smart. I don't interact with children much, so I tend to think of them as very fragile. "Let's hold hands," she announced, as we were about to cross the street. As we walked around the field in back, there were stepping stones, and I was worried she would fall. "I will be careful," she said. At one point she almost tripped and I gasped, and she turned to ME and said, "are you okay??" She is very considerate. When anyone has a problem, she will ask immediately "are you okay?!" You can tell that she has a really good heart. And of course, a lot of energy. 

When I meet children like that, I really hope that I will also have such a happy child one day. She wanted her father to play with her but he had to study. She was about to cry--and most kids I know would just start screaming. But I quickly said, "let's go pick some flowers and bring them back for your daddy. Daddy has to work, so we will take you to play. You like flowers right?" She nodded, and within a few minutes she was smiling. It is a blessing to have such an optimistic child, I think. Such children can look on the bright side and focus on the happy things. I do think of the people I know who blame their parents for so much--certainly there are some awful parents in the world, but I definitely have met some adults who seem to have no heart for their family. They only remember the bad things their parents did, and the mistakes. I wonder if people are born with personalities like that. Some kids are just born to be more forgiving, and others more small hearted? There isn't really an equivalent word in English, but in Chinese one says a person is small hearted when they count tiny grievances and cannot let them go. A child who is optimistic, no matter rich or poor, will manage to have a happy life, I think. 

On the bus ride home, I happened to sit next to someone who was reading the same book as me. What a funny coincidence. Now I'm on the way to Flushing to get Chinese food.

Jones Beach

The last two days, I wandered around Soho and Lower East Side, catching up with old friends and exploring new pockets of the city. New to me anyway, since most of these places have been around for a while. Yesterday, I went to Jones Beach. Who knew there was such a nice beach so close to the city. Prior, I had been to Coney Island and Rockaway beach. I had gotten a bad ear infection swimming at Coney Island (people say it is quite polluted), and it is usually super crowded. Rockaway was better, but I don't really remember it. 

The water was unexpectedly warm, and the sky towards the land was thick with low hanging clouds, while the sky above the water was solid blue. When I looked above, the cloud pattern made the sky look like breaking waves. Since it was Thursday, there were few people. Beside us, a family had brought a stereo and played Latin music, so we could also benefit. Of course, I like Latin music, maybe other people would have found it annoying. I was sad when they packed up, and we were left with silence. It was a beautiful day to spend at the beach though.

I am now on the bus to DC, for my best friend's birthday.

Stevie Wonder

I thought I would be bored coming back to New York, but I forgot that it's impossible to be bored in New York. One can be many other things--broke, stressed, tired--but never bored. If you are bored in New York, then you will likely be bored everywhere else in the world.

On my first day back, I went to a cocktail bar called Pegu, that is themed with the 1930s. There was live music and dancers in costume. 

Yesterday, I walked down fifth avenue, and went to the New York Public library. Lions are used to guard buildings in America too--I took a photo, to compare with the Chinese lions. Chinese lions tend to be portrayed with curlier hair and larger eyes. 

For dinner, I met a friend in Koreatown. She is having some problems with her apartment because her roommate rented to some person who is causing her trouble. She didn't want to go home, so I said we should walk to Central Park. She mentioned there was a Stevie Wonder concert, and she had tried to get the free tickets, but was unable too because they had all been taken within minutes of getting posted online. I figured we could just stand outside the concert venue and listen. When we arrived however, nobody asked for our tickets, so we just walked in. I haven't really listened to his music, but he is a fun performer, and it was very entertaining.

At the library, I started reading the novel Norwegian Wood. I thought of a line from it today, when I visited the United Nations. The author talked about lowering flags at night, and said he doesn't understand why that is done--the country does not stop existing during the night, and there are also many laborers who work throughout the night--don't they deserve the protection of the flag too? Every evening, at the UN, almost 200 flags are lowered and stored in a compartment below the flag pole. I thought the author's comment was interesting. 

I got a massage today too. It was a gift from my past self to my present self. I had forgotten that I bought a groupon a few months ago, and got an email reminding me to use it before it expired. That was nice. The masseuse was from China, and when I spoke to her in Chinese, she was so happy. She gave me extra treatments. I think it must be so tiring to work all day and struggle to communicate with people. When I was traveling through Italy, I remember feeling relieved to just hear some English on TV. It must be hard for workers like her, to constantly have that difficulty. 

A-Wah

I'm back in New York now, and already feeling depressed about the lack of good Chinese food. There is really no Chinese food near I live, at least not decently priced. I realize as well that I developed a bubble tea addiction. 

Back when I was getting ready to go to my friend's wedding, I had a lot of errands to run in very little time--I had to buy a card, go to the bank, and buy some make up, since most of mine was in New York. We also had to stop by the hospital, to visit my friend's relative. On the way, she kept telling me about a good bubble tea place, not far from the hospital. As we were getting ready to leave the hospital however, she said that traffic may be bad.

"We have time," I said, but everyone ignored me like a child, which is the right thing to do because I have no sense of how far anything really is.

She and her fiancé debated the distance, and rattled off our to do list. 

"We can get bubble tea," I kept saying, but no one listened. Finally I said, "right now, bubble tea is first priority!! I can show up without make up, and I can mail her a check later!"

As I drank my bubble tea in the car, it occurred to me that this bubble tea addiction may be out of control. 

Sadly, I am also experiencing Chinese food withdrawal. At least most of the Chinese food I ate was really healthy. In the US, a lot of Chinese restaurants are really greasy. I am now waiting for my food in Chinatown, at A-Wah, mourning the lack of cucumbers and moor mushrooms. This vegetable dish is pretty good though.

Silk and Lace

I met my closest high school friend while in middle school, and I didn't quite like her at first. There were very few Chinese people in our school system, so when I met her, the first thing she said was, "do you eat chicken feet?"

I said yes, and she got super excited and ran around saying, "see! She eats chicken feet too!" 

I suppose she took that to be an immediate bond, and assumed we were already friends, so when we went to lunch and I didn't save a seat for her, she got angry at me. Though we have very different personalities, the cultural similarities did unite us, and we also have kept in touch throughout the years. 

She recently became engaged, and I will be one of her bridesmaids. I also am supposed to design and make the bridesmaids' dresses, which I am really excited about. There are only three, so it should not be too hard. On this trip to Boston, I was going to go wedding dress shopping with her. 

Wedding preparation is itself an enormous and important cultural phenomenon. I had never been dress shopping before, but apparently you have to make appointments. She made an appointment with David's Bridal, so we could get an idea of the styles that she liked. 

At the bridal shop, the assistant said that we should start by picking four dresses, and then can say what we like or don't like. Usually however, people choose one of the first four, because after the fourth, they all kind of look the same and you can't really see so clearly. 

I realized then that you definitely have to go dress shopping with a second person. There is so much stuff involved, that it's really hard to get into these dresses by yourself. Each dress is actually quite heavy--lined with taffeta, or silk, or lace, or beads, or other trim. My friend's budget is 1000. She said that usually, the dresses under 1000 are really ugly, and thinks perhaps that they do this on purpose to get you to spend more money. I told her that for that price, she should go to China. She could get a round trip air ticket to China, and could get a dress custom made for less than 500, easily. Cheaper still, if you use poorer materials. I remember reading a label for a scarf in China, and it read, "100% silk feeling polyester." 

Of course, nobody wants 100% silk feeling polyester for their wedding, so we started with the designer section and picked out one from there, and three more from the David Bridal collection.

She tried on her first, which was a flurry of zipping and clipping and buttoning. You have to wear a bridal undergarment, which is essentially a corset. "I love it!" She proclaimed. "This is my favorite one!"

"But you've only tried one," I said. 

In the end, I think she tried about 10 dresses, but that was still her favorite. The sales person said I was very good at picking and fitting dresses, and that I should work for them. 

We experimented with veils as well. She almost bought the dress, but then decided to wait and try a few more stores. It is a really beautiful gown, and she looked really pretty in it too. 

Friday I'm in Love

I met my oldest friend in Kindergarten, and I didn't like her because she was friends with this girl who I had gotten into a fight with over a bag of Cheetos. To be fair, she didn't like me either. Nevertheless, my parents hired someone to take care of my younger brother while they worked, and it happened to be her grandma. I remember once my parents taking her coat to be dry cleaned because my brother had gotten snot on it, and I had said, "let's not clean it and give it back." And I got yelled at. 

Anyhow, quite quickly we ended up being friends, and becoming quite close. I would go to her house every day after school and her grandmother would take care of the three of us. At the time, the grandma would always be with my brother since he was so little, and she and I would play. It was like having a sister, since we got along really well, but would also fight about stupid things every now and then. "You treat your barbies better than my barbies!!" I said once. 

"You also treat your barbies better than my barbies!!" She yelled back. 

We didn't talk for an hour, but then got over it because honestly if we didn't talk to each other, there was no one else to talk to, and no one else to play with. 

After we moved away, we stayed in touch, up until now. 

I flew back from China to attend her wedding, in Boston, to her high school sweetheart. They had broken up while in college, but got back together while she was in dental school. I remember the first time hearing about him, when she came to New York and he was meeting her in the city. We had gone to lunch and she had commented that she was on some sort of diet, and I had been surprised, because she has always been slender. "You don't need to be on a diet," I had said.

"I know," she said, "but he has to lose weight so he's on a diet, so I feel like I have to be on one too, to support him." The things that people sacrifice for love.

The ceremony was held in a beautiful botanical garden outside Boston, the Tower Hill Botanical Garden. Luckily, the weather was gorgeous. When they announced husband and wife, the song "Friday I'm in Love," by the Cure played.

Both of the fathers gave very cute and touching speeches. The bride's father said, "I am both sad and happy today. I am happy because my daughter has found love. But I am sad because after so many years, she is leaving me for another man...I know [the groom] well, because since high school, he has been trying to marry my daughter...welcome to our family."

The groom's father said, "for my own selfish reasons, I wish that he was a little boy again, and I could raise him again. But now, he is all yours." 

There was a dance floor, largely dominated by middle aged Chinese people, who apparently really love to dance. The groom is really into repairing old cars, so they had repaired an old car and it was used to bring the cake. 

200

This is post number 200! I started this blog in 2009, when I went back packing across Europe by myself. Back then, the idea had been to keep a blog so that my family would know what I was doing, since I would be moving around quite a bit, and it may be more of a hassle to find international phone booths to call home. I said then that I would write every day while traveling, so they would know that I was safe. It has been six years since I started this blog, and in it I have recorded activities in five continents and about 25 countries. Surprisingly, I have been pretty good about keeping my commitment to writing (almost) every day while traveling, and randomly while not traveling. 

I returned home to San Francisco, and now am on the way to Boston, where I grew up. Home is always where your family is, but Boston is always my home town. I'll be attending the wedding of an elementary school friend in Boston, and going wedding dress shopping with a high school friend too. 

I got to spend about four days with my family. I talked a lot about blue sky in China, that I feel like I should say something about the blue sky in California. It's always there. So much that it's easy to take it for granted. Southern China had blue skies, but not like San Francisco--such a deep blue that it almost looked fake to me, after seeing the sky in China for the last month or so. I took a drive to Vacaville, since my mom had a conference there. She was anxious about leaving the house. "Don't forget to feed the fish!!" She said, several times. When she arrived at her hotel, yet again, she said, "don't forget to feed the fish!!"

"Why is mom so paranoid about the fish?" I had asked. We have lots of pets at home, and they are all quite fat so lack of food is never an issue for our animals.

As it turned out, on Thursday morning, the third day after she had left, my dad asked me, "did you feed the fish?"

"Of course not," I replied. "I don't live here, and I don't know where the fish food is, why would I feed the fish?"

My brother earlier had shrugged and said, "fish don't need to eat every day, they can go a week without food," so he definitely didn't feed the fish either. 

My dad hurried quickly to feed them. Our animals, in their old age, now have quite a bit of daily needs. Our house is guarded by a blind dog and a deaf dog, so between the two of them, at least there is one working set of eyes and one working set of ears. The blind dog also is diabetic and needs daily insulin medication and eye medication. The deaf dog now barks extra loudly because she can't hear herself barking very well. She is not completely deaf, but cannot hear many things unless you say it loudly. She gets sad and jealous when the other dog gets his medicine, so my dad has to pretend to give her medicine too so she won't feel left out. 

Noting the difference between Delta and Air China's safety videos. Air China uses a panda, while Delta uses a pirate, a cowboy, and a ventriloquist. 

In Detroit, I heard a dad arguing with his son, who must be 2 or so. The son wanted to pass the food court and said, "I'm not hungry!"

The dad said, "but I'm hungry. What are we going to do about that?"

The kid said, "okay you can be hungry but I'm not hungry," and proceeded to run away. 

I think it's funny when parents try to reason and use logic with small children, who at their core are not very logical. 

End of China Trip

Lastly, I wanted to wrap up this trip with general comments, if that's what you call them. I love New York, but being in China this past month felt like a really, really good appetizer--I feel like I'm not done, like the entree should still be coming. I didn't have enough time, and there is still so much left to do. There is definitely a part of me that feels at home on the road, and moving from city to city had a certain freedom to it that I miss already. I have my routine in New York, but I also have my routine while moving around. Usually I sleep and wake up early--in bed around 11 pm, and awake by 8:30 am. I don't know why it's so hard to get proper sleep in New York. I guess it's probably because I'm working full time too. 

When I wake up, I usually write down everything I did the day before, while having breakfast. Or I do this on the train, depending on whether it's a day that I'm switching cities or not. I like that I maximize my day time in China, and pretty much spend the entire day outside, walking around. Air quality was pretty bad in Beijing, so my skin got worse there. 

Beijing is really not that nice. I would actually recommend you just skip Beijing if you go to China, but I guess everyone wants to see the Great Wall and the Forbidden City. 

My favorite moments in China are spent walking with no particular destination. Walking along the old alleys in Beijing, around Nanluoguxiang, during the day when there are fewer people and I have the streets to myself. Walking along the canals of Tongli and Luzhi, where the green water is so still that even a woman dipping her hands in to wash a shirt is such a disturbance that large ripples spread throughout the water. Walking along the city walls of Nanjing, where the dragonflies and butterflies fly beside me, doing their dance for summer. Walking along the shops of Shanghai, ignoring my aching wallet as I venture into store after store. Walking through the gardens of Suzhou around closing time, when again, it's more spacious and it feels like the pathways belong to me alone. 

Aside from walking, my next obvious favorite moments are eating. Cracking open shellfish loudly with my relatives in Qingdao, who keep yelling at me to eat more. "Drink more! Eat more! You are too skinny, that is bad, eat more!" They go through the trouble of dismembering crab and snails and other shellfish for me, since they imagine that being an American, I can't do it properly. I feel obligated to eat since they go through the trouble, and as soon as something goes into my mouth, there is another huge hunk of meat to take its place on my plate. 

I can't eat anymore," I say, feeling like I'll explode. 

They look aghast. "That's not possible. You haven't eaten anything at all!" They look so offended that I force myself to eat a few more scallops, and there is laughter once again.  

"I can't drink anymore," I say. 

"Okay okay," they say, but then a few minutes later, there is another round of clinking glasses, and if I don't drink, that's just rude. Not only is my glass never empty, it is always full almost to the brim. People in Qingdao are really warm hearted, especially to family. 

It was really nice eating with family and friends, but most of my meals were spent by myself as I traveled. I used to hate eating alone, but somehow now I don't really mind it. In fact, I've really enjoyed most of my alone time in China. There is no rushing to meet someone else's clock, or to make an appointment. The day lasts as long as I want it to, ends when I want it to. It almost feels like I can control time. Sitting over my meals, I can stay for as long as I want, and leave as soon as I want. 

I had a brief, wonderful moment of a hybrid between bubble tea and taro tapioca. A sales lady approached me, disturbing me. It was the only time that I pretended not to speak Chinese, so she would go away. She actually stayed and tried to make conversation anyway, but I just smiled and nodded, like I couldn't understand. Eventually she gave up, and my drink and I could continue our quality time together. 

It's a lot easier to live in China than New York, cost wise. People do make less, but if you have a higher educational degree, you still can afford a far better standard of living in comparison to major US cities. I think I will see what happens in New York for the next two months or so. If I end up with a job, I'll stay in New York. Otherwise, I think I will go back to China. There are apparently, a lot of job opportunities there for teaching English. 

Here are a few more photos, of random moments that I've enjoyed during my travels: 

Shopping (photo is outside of a store in Nanluoguxiang)

Visiting all of the different temples in different cities (photo in Nanjing)

Night Markets (Nanjing)

Tea time (photo in Luzhi)

Chinese myth and astrology (photo at Lao Shan in Qingdao)

Riding around in motorcycle and rickshaw taxis (photo in Suzhou)

Chinese art (photo taken in Suzhou)

Sunsets in the South (photo in Nanjing)

Chinese Food

I'm not sure what I'll do in the states, without my ready access to amazing Chinese food. I already have some pictures of food in my other posts, but here are some more.

My last meal in Beijing

A great meal of my favorites in Suzhou

Chinese train stations have awesome food

Last, home cooked meal in China

Dumplings in Qingdao--the black, squid ink one is their specialty

Scallops in Qingdao

My favorite Sesame Balls!

Organic Chinese peaches

Chinese People

I've returned to the US, so I have uploaded a lot more photos in my previous posts. It was such a great trip that I miss China already. While there, I took a lot of photos of scenery, but also took photos of some people going about their daily activities (or doing tourist activities, like myself). Especially when traveling alone, I like to imagine the back story to people that I see. 

Man shoveling bricks by Nanluoguxiang

A photo that largely exemplifies, to me, China's one child policy (now a two child policy though)

Selfie culture

Feeding the fish with a bottle

A man and his best friend

A first date?

Resourcefulness on the subway

Blue Sky and Peking Duck

My friend's favorite Peking Duck restaurant

They use a traditional stove

On my last day in China, Beijing gave me a present. The first blue sky I have seen in Beijing since I came here in July. It was as though the city wanted to say, "you see, we can do it too." I recall my relatives in Qingdao saying you can stay a month in Beijing and never see the sun; I had long given up on seeing the sky in Beijing, but here it was.

Last night, it had been too hard to get a table, so we decided to go get a massage and try again at a later time. In China, there are "blind massage" parlors. According to my friend, these are set up to help people with vision impairment find jobs. All of the masseuses are blind or vision impaired, and the establishments are subsidized by the government as part of their initiative to assist people with disabilities. My friend said that the services are not fancy, like most other spas, but she goes more for charity, to support their livelihoods. Supposedly, these masseuses are very good because they rely a lot more on their sense of touch than people who can see do. 

This was definitely one of the best massages I had have in my life. Already, the masseuses in China are better than the ones I have been to in the US. They are very good at acupressure. They press a point on your back, and the pain radiates through your hip. The masseuse was very skilled. He would touch a point and comment. "You sleep late?" I do. "The muscle in this area tends to be tight for people who sleep late."

"No," his colleague argued, "it's for people who don't get enough sleep." 

Apparently my spine is a little bent to the right, and I should do left side exercises to fix that. He also suggested I play badminton to fix stuff shoulders. It was a great massage, but I left feeling very concerned about the current state of my muscular and skeletal frameworks. 

After the massage, we got a table at a Beijjng style hot pot restaurant. At this type of hot pot, you do not mix your own sauce, which made me immediately skeptical because I am quite picky about my sauce. They give you some concoction made of sesame paste and cilantro. My friend's boyfriend was very excited about going to hot pot. She told me, "these restaurants are more targeted to men, that's why there aren't a lot of vegetables on the menu. Men like this type of hot pot because it's mostly meat, and the beer is cheap. That is what men look for in restaurants--beer and meat." It was very good, and I guess beer and meat usually is pretty good. 

Today, we went back to that famous Peking duck place, in the alley. We managed to get their last table right at opening time, 11:00 am. Apparently a lot of ambassadors have been there, and they have a wall of all the famous people who have visited. It is not a fancy establishment at all. To be honest, I don't think the Peking duck in Beijing is better than in the US. It is good, but I would still say the best Peking duck that I had in my life was at Chef Chang's Duck House in Boston, but they have closed down. That duck was so fat and juicy. Along with the duck at this restaurant, called Liqun, they had sautéed duck gizzard and liver. I like that for the most part, Chinese use every part of the animal. Americans may find it gross, but it makes sense--you've killed an animal, you really should waste as little as possible. My pet peeve, when cooking for picky eaters, is when people don't eat poultry skin. Not just that, but they don't eat the meat around the skin or the bone, so in the end, only a sliver of meat is consumed and so much is thrown away. I get that the skin is unhealthy, so I understand why people don't eat it--but I still hate seeing it thrown away. I had one of my favorite dishes at that restaurant--caramelized sweet potato. I have only had this once before. They serve the sweet potato covered with caramelized sugar sauce. You get a dish of cold water, which you dip the potato in, so the sugar around it becomes hardened. So good. I wish now that I had brought it on the plane with me, but my friend took it back home with her. 

I am now on the plane to San Francisco. I have to say, the Beijing airport is so nice. They offer free luggage trolleys, which made things a lot easier for me. If airports want to increase the money spent at duty free, they should provide these little trolleys. I would no have gone shopping at all, because I would have been tired carrying my bags, but since I had the trolley, I went to a few stores. But I behaved and didn't buy anything, having devoted all of my finances to Shanghai already. 

I only saw a small slice of China, and if I have time and the resources, I would really like to see more of it. 

Panjiayuan Antiques Market

Today I went to an arts and antiques market called Panjiayuan. I had been planning to go earlier, but my Chinese friend suggested that I wait and go with her, because she was certain that I would get ripped off. 

I love Panjiayuan! It's like going to a museum, except everything is for sale. It's divided into many sections. My favorite of course, was the paintings. Acrylic and oil on canvas, Chinese brush painting and water color, silk weaved paintings, and aisles and aisles of calligraphy. I saw a painting with horses that I really liked, for my brother, who was born in the year of the horse. When you purchase a painting, you can take it to a calligrapher, who will write something on it for you. My friend suggested some phrases, and I picked one, which the calligrapher wrote then and there.

Because I myself paint, I seldom find paintings that I really want to buy, mainly because I enjoy the process of making it myself. There was however, an enormous painting of a Buddhist deity, with several arms. It was done beautifully, and would be impossible for me to create anything near to it. The problem wasn't the price--whatever they charged was very cheap compared to prices in the US--1800 Rmb for a huge painting, and I probably could have bargained it down to 1200--about 200 USD. The problem was that it was so huge--I wasn't really sure there was any place in our house to put it. This is the type of painting that should be hung in the lobby of a hotel, with high ceilings. Additionally, it would have costed around 500 at least to frame it. 

While I was walking, I thought about buying some random beads for my mom. My mom really likes fossils, which I don't really like at all. I thought I saw some Amber fossils, so I stopped, when I saw a stone pendant that I did like. It was made of pink crystal, and carved in the shape of a fox. I never buy stones of this sort, but I like foxes because they are cute and graceful at the same time. In lore, they are also very intelligent. The stone had a few tiny imperfections, and the seller said, "there are marks, but the color is good."

He was right, that stone was particularly pink, and it was quite large. My friend asked if there is a fox carved with better quality stone. The seller said, "normally, nice stones are not used to carve foxes. Foxes do not sell well." He reached into his bag, and pulled out a wrapped package. "This is what we carve using nice stones." It was a buddha, deep pink, almost opaque, and perfectly consistent in color. 

I'm not sure why foxes do not sell well, but indeed this was the only store where I saw foxes at all. In Asia there is the ghost fox myth. The ghost fox, also known as a kitsune, is a controversial animal. In some stories, they are benevolent deities, while in others they disguise themselves as beautiful women to seduce men and steal their Qi. Perhaps they are a bit unpredictable, but I like them. They are far more interesting, even in their worst form, than the likes of Cinderella or Snow White, who don't really do anything at all except look pretty, get bullied because they are pretty, and then get saved because they are pretty and consequently a rich and powerful man marries them. At least the ghost fox has supernatural powers, and is crafty. 

I tried to bargain with the owner, who originally refused. But, when he asked where I was from, I said I was an American but my dad's family was from Suzhou. This Suzhou dropping seems to work quite well for me. The man said, "I love Suzhou. I went to college there, it is my favorite place." As a result, he ended up giving me a rather large discount. I took my stone to be strung into a necklace, and wore it right away. 

The market has a lot of other antiques, including old porcelain, and several aisles devoted just to jade. Another aisle has good carved of sandalwood. Sandalwood is one of my favorite smells. I think the best smell for women's perfume is jasmine or lilac, and for men it is sandalwood. I had bought two jasmine buds before, and they had been great--whenever a breeze blew, or I turned a bit, I would smell it. But then when I went to the bathroom it slipped from my shirt and fell into the toilet, so that was the end of that. Notably, a friend of mine from Virginia had told me that "only hookers wear jasmine." Whatever, jasmine is still one of my favorite scents, and in Asia, it's a very popular one. There were antique sandalwood fans that were very expensive but beautifully and intricately carved. Past the sandalwood, there were aisles of beads--ceramic beads, metal beads, stone beads--and many jewelers. Panjiayuan is probably the most interesting market that I have seen in China.

As I said yesterday, it hailed in Beijing, and my friend's car got dented really badly. Several little indentations are all over her roof and hood. I had been in a bad mood then, because I was tired and my knee hurt. While waiting in line for the bathroom, a little girl cut in front of me. Her dad said, "do you have to go urgently? Want to use the men's room?"

"Who wants to use the men's bathroom??" She snapped. 

I let her go ahead of me, since she was small. On my way out however, another girl, older this time, tried to enter the stall while I was still in it. This is my biggest pet peeve in China--I already hate public restrooms because they are dirty, and I want to exit as soon as possible--it makes no sense to try to enter while I'm still in the tiny stall, they end up bumping me against the dirty wall, and it's just nasty for both of us--it's like trying to get into a parking space before the other person pulls out. So this time I snapped and said, "can you just wait for me to exit first??" She backed away, glowering at me. 

My Chinese friend gave me a packet of paper soap, which has become one of my most appreciated items. Few restrooms have toilet paper or soap, especially in tourist places, so I have been grateful for this paper soap--it is in a stack, each sheet the size of one of those listerine strips. You wet it and it works great.

My friend went shopping with me again, because she thought I was better at bargaining. Afterwards, we tried to go to her favorite Peking duck place--it's in a small alley. The line was insane--so we will try to go there tomorrow instead. We tried another hot pot restaurant, and it was the same.

Apparently, today is "li chiou," the day when summer turns to autumn. From today supposedly, every day just gets colder and colder, so people are supposed to eat a good dinner today, and eat meat, to store fat for the winter. Hopefully we will be able to get a table somewhere. Beijing is similar to New York in that word of good restaurants tends to spread quickly, and there is often a line. 

The calligrapher adding words to my brush painting

Two Kirin in the market outside

My fox pendant

Two lions sharing a secret

One of the art aisles

A painting that I liked a lot